Hugo Rodriguez

RETURNZ OF THA DOG

Tue, 13 Aug 2002 13:21:18 GMT

Woah how long it been i dunno too long since HUGO say the word to his crew. this is the real shit, you know it

anyway i am just back from the san diego comi-cons this was a pulse racin experience goin to get sign up by marveol or dc maybe, DA ROOLZ gettin popular need to make it to da MASS MARKET yo

so i load up the red truck set off drivin tuesday listenin to SNOOP an 2PAC get ready for CALIFORNIA, the drive be long an only interupted by goin to truck stops for some beer, drivin on the freeway go quick if you are a tad bit drunk this is my TIP TO YOU

At one truck stop i get talkin to a waitress she real nice liken hugo an impressed by my AFRO which now pretty big by the way, thinken there is time for action but while we gettin it on like almost naked in da kitchen COOK comes in wavin knife SHIT pparently it his girlfriedn oh well bygones

So i am stayin at a real party place in SAN D it be called the BANANA BUNGALOWS damn it is full of cute yyoung girl but HUGO has BUSINESS in mind i dunno if i ever gonna make up college fund for MOOKIE gotta get signed up usin natural talents.......!

Anyway wednesday night i walkin round town see FRIEND RICH STEVEN yo troubles behind us now wid da SWEETYS MAN he say come an sign sketches folks dig your shit so I say YEAH things lookin up!!!!!

He got a real nice lady friend she too good for him i dunno i think she be FLIRTIN wid da H-DOG yo i never too good at seein the signs so i just assume they is GO! she show me her GUN damn that is nice gotta little pearl handle an shit real lady like, any way I leave to go to HOOTERS need that HEALTH FOOD yo gotta stay ripped

i say i see them in the morning yo but PROBLEMS ARISE when i drinken a lot of whisky just havin fun with some new friends i make. wake up at four pm at the banana place with some kind of dirty old lady in my bed DAMN hugo she is a HOBO oh well holidays is time for fun... dirty fun too ha

by the time i get to convention it closed, have trouble gettin rid of Hobo Lady yo she claim we get married onna ship i remember no such thing DAMN any way i give her $60 she say that will pay for divorce SEEMS HARSH

i gotta go do some work on shop roof (RITE AID yo wave maybe) so i tell more later

PEACE
H

body fail, possible last ever entry yo

Mon, 08 Apr 2002 18:50:46 GMT

yo this is hugo writin from bed sippin a malt an desperatly tryin to find the strength to represent for ohio crew.

trouble start friday night yo i not feelin so fresh up say to ronny b "yo maybe i gettin a cold we should not go to the BAR" but ronny b say you a big fat BABY so I try to hit him but ronny got big arms and i just FLAPPIn AROUND, shit, DIGNITY be lost.

ronny say we go and drink because that kill disease i thinkin, yo i feel bad after a night of liquor so imagine how back-teria is feelin

halfway through da NIGHT Hugo start feelin WEIRD an WOOZY , me an ronny b hook up with couple of ladys they aint nothin to look at but they be KEEN, spot dat ROnny an me wearin crazy gumby GOLD and wants to be with us, yo.

any way we dont get no play because they boyfriend turn up an they be FRONTIN, when will a brother learn we gots to increase DA PEACE, sharing a woman bee like the greatest gift a man can give cept they dont agree an we get drinks poured over us

SO eventful night over go to bed, wake up in MORNING DYING OF SHIVERS AN CHILLS check LIL HUGO to make sure it aint DA CLAP yo but lil HUgo more likea monk than than a MONKEY an i aint got money for no hookers, spent it all on BODYBUILlDING DRINKS which i must say be a pile of shit it aintt even drinks....... be powder cant drink that.

anyway it aint the clap lil hugo be sleepin easy an now i am dyin i think or maybe flu MOMMA always say drinkin lots of fluids so i got a big bottle of olde english i maybe update later peace out RIKKI LAKE time

H

INSANE TERRORS IN MY MIND

Thu, 04 Apr 2002 12:28:45 GMT

Last night i went out drinkin with friend RONNY B just got the money for the oddfellows roof job. Ronny b be telling me he is having bad dreams bout firey trees and PUNISHMENT says he is thinkin bout CHANGES in he life maybe he been BAD and will go to hell. Now i dont believe all that but ronny keeps talkin bout JESUS and says i been living my life wrong, chasin TAIL when i should be frontin for KRYSTELLE and DA KIDS.

i remind him that krystell leave ME through a misunderstandin but he not too intrested - he be starin all weird like VIETNAM VET charlie in the trees etc

anyway we have a few more drinks an he gets me convinced to make things good wid KRYSTELLE, i am swaying with the crazy amounts of liquor i have drunk but we make it to her house, light be out so i climb in window to REPRESENT 4 LOVE

Get upstairs to make things right with LIL HUGOs help know what i mean but WHAT DA JUICE she is in bed with a man. some big dude he wake up grab me krystelle screamin, mookie and alaraine run in shit I don't know what to do some how i wriggle loose and RUN AWAY, outta there

So krystelle got a new man an i wake up in a field, shit i got to make some changes.

Peace
H

SOCIETY TROUBLIN

Wed, 03 Apr 2002 14:09:39 GMT

Yo sorry it be a time since I post, da H dog been away on BUSINESS. Gotta represent etc

Ronny B be sayin maybe we is HICKS or rednecks some shit any way I say DONT FRONT ON THE BLACK MAN he say you not black Hugo then we be fightin for a while til he pull a gun anyway we friends now. this be worryin me because i gots to fess up for the good EDUCATION for mookie an alaraine gotta set a good EXAMPLE

anyway i say what do we do to not be HICKS he say "go drink coffee not beer' well that seem easy RIGHT? So on Saturday we go to starbucks an buy the coffees. this does not look like coffee more like ICE CREAM full o cream an shit, more fun to spread it on a LAD but MAYBE LATER WE THINK heh.

Well unbelievable thing be that coffee house full of STUDENT GIRLS they be crazy fresh talkin bout indy rock an MATH me an ronny keep watch for our opportunities. RECOGNIZE. a couple hours pass an we spent about forty dollar on coffee it go down real nice an i notice RONNY B be ANTSY all crazy and shit. fuck me the CAFFENE make him NUTZ!!

anyway he go over to the girls and first they be LAUGHIN then they look SCARED so H goes over to HELP wid LOVE. Ronny B say somethin bout ass an one girl SPRAY HE IN THE FACE WITH MACE!

SHIT!!

yo i try to calm things but some cute lady got a taser an i dont know if it be that or the cafene but soon i am TWITCHIN an the police come later. anyway long story short we is banned from NOT BEING HICKS which fess up is not FAIR.

No idea how college guy get chicks
Those damn ho be tougher than HICKS
Wigglin ass and drinkin tea
Think they too good for RONNY AND ME

FESS UP

Peace
H

MUSICK BIZ

Wed, 13 Mar 2002 13:01:34 GMT

Yo it been a few days since Hugo update, weekend was ILLUMINATIN my brain with all the fresh crazyness.

Musics recording be going sweet, CANADIA RADIO will soon be rockin to a mix up inna area wid ELLEINAD. she say it have commercial potential to go global an hugo will get to make it wid SHAKIRA an other hot pop babes.

Had a fight wid dinky dawson an= we are no longer collaboratin. after a day layin down some wicked bad musics Hugo be feelin relaxed, so i drank a bottle of liquor an started playin with my GUN. Yo whatever you say guns don kill people people kill people, usually wid guns but DAT NOT THE POINT. anyway i was all burnin up with MAD ENERGIES so i went out to shoot off a few shots into the sky. unfortuantely i shot a dog but he wasn't dead, he was BITIN ME. he bit through a main vein (not THE main vein HA) BLOOD BLEED so hugo went to hospitel.

well even though i be faint, i thinkin 'nurses be hot, maybe get some ACTION'. anyway i strip down for action but the nurse be a MAN an he not please to see 100lbs of hot PUERTO RICA hunk waitin for him. after a mild dis-agreements i ran away an hid, naked , in the hospital grounds.

anyway i still bleedin an pass out an when i wake up KRYSTELLE be there and she not happy, says she have to pay hospital bill an for the second time in one day I making a run for it, this time at least i have a gown. i waitin on the corner for a bus an some boys say "we seein yo ass mister" so i try to punch them but they beat shit outta me by 5 o'clock i in hospital again DAMN SHIT FUCKEN REPRESENT
this time the nurse be hot an maybe we get a little closer, i ask her for a date

anyway i be home now an RETIRE FROM THE MUSICS GAME all too insane, dinky is sad but i kick him out dirty HIPPIE

Time to get count chockula LATERS

peace
H

MUSICIN

Tue, 05 Mar 2002 13:18:11 GMT

Yo up early cos spent yesterday indoors RECORDIN. Yo I be fresh collaboratin wid CANADAIAN MUSIC LEGEND elleinad makin a song from the heart yo.

in the mornin we set up a studio in the PAd, friend DINKY DAWSON from schooldays come round about an stick a egg box on the wall to sound-proof. Dinky always be stoned an listenin to greatful Dead an Phish but he wicked fat music guy CANTON STYLE.

anyway we listen to elleinad music an think up some rhymes bpout hugo HISTORY, dinky say it has to come from DA HEART i not so sure but after some beers felt that was OKAY an we make FrESH SOUND yo

now it be not long b4 yo see HUGO on TRL wid carson daley man mookie an alaraine think I so fresh. MP3 SOON!!!!

Later on neighbour come round an tell us not to make so much noise we be on the roof playin ROCK n ROLL music all night long

that is astory for another day but dinky say hugo has music in he blood so we will see

anyway gotta get up some roof an lay some felt yo yo gotta work it RECOGNIZE

PEACE
H

TROUBLIN

Sun, 03 Mar 2002 14:19:18 GMT

Brother be lookin back at old entries in my LIVEJOURNAL an wonderin how times change an shit. Yo i was a famly man with problems, love and trouble, not i gots to represent for MY SELF.

I spend yesterday workin on a new gym to get massive an ripped for Canadia trip. Canadian girls be big an stong with eatin maple syrup an pancakes an bacon - Hugo be WIRY so it is time to get HUGE.

Thinkin maybe bout gettin some bodybuiildin aid, got an email today sayin:

HARD TO OBTAIN PHARMACEUTICAL MUSCLE ENHANCERS!
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

D-BOL - WINNI V - EQUIPOSE - MASTERBOLAN

Obtain These Powerful Products Legally!

Also Available. . . - Liquid Anodrol - Deca Nor 50 - Sustenol 250 - GHB - Somatroph HGH
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

SIDE EFFECT FREE!

Anyway I got out the credit card an ordered a shitload. Let yo know how i go. One is called masterbolan, didn't get that cause i been doin too much MASTERBOLAN since krystelle leave ha AH ha.

Just little joke ladys.
PEACE OUT H-KRU
H

Recognize

Sat, 02 Mar 2002 10:45:43 GMT

Shit it been a long time since i post, i been thru some INEXPLICABLLE CRAP that has made my world totally crazy an disupted my flow. some of this shit hurts like hittin your nut on the corrner of the BATH but i gots to REPRESENT for my ABCENSE, yo yo

big news is Krystelle has left me after unfortunate incident wid me spendin all the vacation money an mookie college money on a new red truck. she scream an cry an take mookie and alaraine wid her, say i destroy teh fam'ly but i cannot understand.

it is a really nice truck. havin a truck like that is like havin a vacation EVERY DAY, REPRESENT. not much like goin to college yo but really i spend all the college money on beer so she has no reasonin 2 be upset.

anyway brother been sittin round the house all dirty an sad,, funny how ASS be available all the time went yo married now can't get shit. ronny b comes over but i mad with him, we made up after a fight where i knock off his hat an he knock out my tooth, recognize.

But HUGO FAME GROWS!!!!! yo rich stevens Diesel sweety an his friends on diesel sweety mad PIXELS board be kind an help me REPRESENT AGAIN yo yo mad respectin mixin up in the AREA. now beatiful ladies in CANADIA be WRITIN like elller and wicke feliner an i don know what do do they be all smart an shit wid high school diploma.

hugo may not know book learnin but i know WOMAN LEARNIN Canadia soon be a happier place HERE I COME shit when i find my pass port

yo this shit be like therepy

I LOVE YOU MOOKIE AND ALARAINE

Weekend o CRAZYNESS

Mon, 29 Oct 2001 18:28:39 GMT

Yo my true brother Ronny B came to visit this weekend, we been friends since we was born, or mayb e 2. When we was maybe 16, 17 me and ronny used to party a lot together and try an get the local girls to appear in films we made, heh i still got a few of those not bad for amateur.

Anyway Ronny B be a DJ, he tell everyone he is 25 which is shit he be 39 but he took so much acid he got a kind of innoicent look and everyone believe him.

So anyway Ronny b be DJing at a rave in Oxford, i know nohing bout that shit, when we were kids we like Biz markie and shit, all the old school, but Ronny say it bew a load of teenagers off their fucking pipes on X. Now i be not touchin the drugs cepts weed since i marry Krystelle, i be a family man yo. but he say it be cool and we be feeling like we love everyone so i go along

WOW IT BE FUCKIN INCREDIBLE AT THE RAVE, yo i think kids be listenin to linkin bizkit and shit but no! actually the music was shit til Ronny give me two tablet, i say i want a beer he say just drink some water if yo feelin hot.

WELL HUGO ALWAYS HOT! BUT THINGS GET HOTTER!

about an hour later all music sound incredible good!!!! i think ronny get the good songs out and i cant stop dancin, i got my shirt off and prety teenage girls be huggin me and givin me GLOWSTICKS, they be wearin pretty purple wig an me want to be touchin em, luckily TEMPTATION not a problem as X make everyone love everyone and one shive her tonge into my mouth

Night go on til 6 i haave too more pills fucking ROCKIn get home Mookie an alaraine be watchin cartoons never notice before but scooby doo song be wickedest song ever also sound of kettle be fucking magic song too!!!!!!!!

then ronny b ask for money for the pills we have minor fight maybe not see him for a while, yo

This is the way it always go GO PARTY FUCKIN A!!!!!!!!!!

Peace H

Da Story CONTINUES yo

Thu, 25 Oct 2001 11:51:52 GMT

Yo yo H-Kru this one goin out to all the brothers, maybe sistas too but maybe this entry not for them.

UPDATE ON SCHoOL teacher: Yo I get to school at 3 to pick up alaraine and things be lookin bad, can't see Miss peters anywhere so start singin to myself 'sorry miss peters i am for REEEEAALLL' yo and she creeps up behind me HA! she says ah mr rodrieguez Alaraine been real good today but we need to have a talk in my office yo i am thinkin GAME ON so we sits down. she is real sweet and is takin off her spectacles an tellin me shit about alaraine be exceptional in her class like but I ain't listening, i just thinking about makin it with that sweet lady in the back of my eye.

But Hugo has a ROOL: play it cool, so i be noddin and sayin yeah yeah grade point average shit yeah know what you mean blah etc all the time thinkin of her skinny ass doin a dance yo.

she gets up to show me to the door an i think, yo, i misread the signs, except i can't get up cos HUGO JUNIOR be on HIS game, he don't realise match postponed heh, yo my embarrassment must be covered so i say 'yo that a real pretty dress'. she be worried lookin so fuck i gotta walk out bent over double like

I say 'wanna see me sometime" but sorta mumble it so she don't hear, yo bent over with HUGO JR problems can't even check out her rack DAMN

Anyway looks like i missed out on this one saw her gettin in her boyfriend car he look a real pencil neck lawyer gumbo piecea shit

went to bed early
PEACE
H

Yo where is everyone

Wed, 24 Oct 2001 18:55:14 GMT

Hey KRU i be just wonderin why no one makin comments on Hugos LJ.

I always got shit to say to my cartooning buds like Aron Holms and Curt Berry but none a them want to fess uup to me. Hey kru, get with the H-BOMB!

Nuff grumblin, I got a little tale to tell bout when i took alaraine to school this mornin, she so pretty just like her mother, if any boy touch her i be touchin him so hard he be not gettin up heh.

anyway i be walkin alaraine to school, she is real bright an talkin bout pokeymon and peekachoo i don't know what the fuck she be talkin on so i just laugh and smile, when i see her teacher.

now miss peters (dont know her first name) be sweet, maybe 25 an has little spectacles, she look pure but hugo bet you a $ she aint. so i walks up all calm and cool sayin 'how be alaraine doin" she say "aw fine, she is real clever and don't wet herself no more' all that shit, very nice

THEN I NOTICES SHE IS TOUCHIN MY HAND!!!!!

KKids go inside when bell rings and she be still talkin to me an touchin my hand, yo if anyone tell me to bend over at that minute lets just say THERE WOULD BE RESSISTANCE!!!!

O i am goin to pick her up this aftenoon HUGO WILL REPRESEMT gotta get that schoolteacher a little drunk maybe go out heh.

Anyway respec to ALL BE POSTIN GUYS SERIOUSLY

Peace
H

Creative

Tue, 23 Oct 2001 12:46:52 GMT

Yesterday I was layin some felt on a roof in Oxford. Yo my rep be gettin far an wide, ladies like having me round the house I be makin them feel safe. Yo they panties ain't safe heh but that shit's for another time.

Amyway I am on the roof with some tacks and a plane flies over i am thinkin FUCK the army is goin to shoot osama bin lid and KICK HIS ASS GO USA!!!

I have a bit of paper in my pocket and a rap comes to me about the war so i scribble that shit down, here goes:

WAR RAP by H DOG

Yo bad shit goin down in the east
Bin laden is like some mystikal beast
he be fuckin your daughter an rapin your mom
let's crush his ass wid da GREAT big bomb!!!
I got bitches an shorties they be wearin no clothes
They be wearing veils if they be TALIBAN HOES
Go on american, kick in he face
Crush all the afghan and win the SPACE RACE
Yo peace out

H

BIGGEST LOCo ADVENTuRE EVER!!!!!!!!

Mon, 22 Oct 2001 19:46:10 GMT

Yo yo, good to be back, i meant to post over the weekend but shit went down that was so totally intense I COULDN't write nothin not that I xcoulda anyways because I was UNDISPOSED, see?

It all starts Friday evening. Krystelle be goin out with her friends Sue and Pam to get wasted, an Mookie is lookin after Alaraine so i decides to go to a bar outside town and have me some fun (after I hide all the matches because Mookie is goin through a phase or some shit, he burn everything in site)

Anyway I ggo to this dirty little bar in Dover, shootin some pool when this blonde walks in, she is hot as fuck wearin little jeans shorts an tight top, damn near seein everything yo. So I plays it coo

Five beers later and we is playin pool, after seven she is on the table an Hugo be ridin that beautiful ass. Then a BIG FUCKIN HAND pulls me off an im there with my pants on the floor gettin a punch to the gut, she is cryin like "no no he is just a friend it is he birthday"

These brothers be frontin on the black maan, yo. but not time for human rights cause this human be STUFFED IN TRUNK OF A CAR. SHITT!!!! I ain't scared cause i got a knife, only then i reliase my pantys be in the bar and my knife be in them. but i aain't cryin.

HUGO BE BRAVE\

After maybe a hour the car stops and they get me out, only a shirt and shoes on. I say "please please my wife yknow i got KIDS and shit" but they pulls out chains and gets ready to hurt the H-Dog.

Then the cops pulls up and beats the crap outta them, guess blondie musta called em. Anyway I go home iin patrol car with no pants on just some old blanket they given me and exppectin the worst from Krystellle but when I get home she is so drunk and so don't see what the hell is goin on

I tell mookie i been solving crimes. TROUSER STEALIN crimes, yo

FUCK i better not go back that bar

Anyway PEACE OUT H-Kru

NIGHT TERRORS 2

Fri, 19 Oct 2001 10:44:11 GMT

Shit i just wake up in a sweat havin crazy dreams, weird shit. Alaraine come runnin in she hear me screamin, i be standin by the closet holdin A KNIFE.

Dream was i was in the Viet Cong and fightin for the USA then FUCK they drop a shit load of napalm on us but i somehow manage to escape and start fightin with Charlie Cong with some chicken bones I find.

Anyway i wake up with blood all over the carpet an I think SHIT i cut up my wife but no i just opened up my stitches, what a mess.

Anyway i goin back to sleep, just had to share wid da KRU.

Peace
H

LIVIN IN Baysid

Thu, 18 Oct 2001 17:29:29 GMT

Yo jus wanna say a few words about my favorite web comic strip "LIFE AT BAYSIDE" by Curt Berry.

This shit represents. Curt is tellin a big story mde out of small ones and he got some fresh cool characters like Bonnie who fuckin hot and milton who is kind of Curt, is is a wicked little dude, and now he has done a story... woah...

he has drawn the first BEAVER in Keenspot history

i bet he'll be gettin shitloads a hits now, brothers be waitin for their latest hit o hot. Yo he even drew fur, that ain;t the fashion for HEN-TIE but I digs it anyway, that shit is awesome.

Hopin that my brother be makin more comics an gettin hotter, Curt truly has comics comin out of a special place. Yo I got a comic, DA ROOLZ, it be on HIATUS but I gota bring dat shit back, totally inspired.

I wonder if Currt would do a CRIZZ-OSSOVER wid me!

Peaces all, out
H

Building up STRONG

Thu, 18 Oct 2001 12:19:18 GMT

Yo yo what some of you guys out there in Livejournal land may not know is that HUGO used to be CHAMPION BODYBUILDER. yo when i got out of jail i was pretty big from doin exercises in my cell and shit. Body huge, massive abs and shit no wonder soon after I got with Krystelle, she loved my body.

Anyway i got sick five or six years back turned out it was a TAPEWORM, i got real thin and the muscles went, yo the main vein wasn't pumpin so good neither HA (not funny at the time).

Drank some mercury to kill the tapeworm, the guys at the bar said that would work. Anyways I never been so fuckin sick in my life, pukin blood, but i puked up the tapeworm too.

No I am gettin back to body building ways as dizz-og Hugo be gettin a belly. Yo you can get all kinds a anabollic shit now, better than in the 80s, i am already stratin to get massive Krystelle can't me alone, be bitin me an shit in bed.

ANyuway just wanted to share, CREW.

Peace
H

Hard Night

Tue, 16 Oct 2001 12:15:09 GMT

Yo be havin the night terrors, dreamed Sisqo that little baby man be chasin my ass around, Krystelle be on the couch say i was kickin an punchin SHIT!!!

Mookie be cryin more later

SHIT

Mon, 06 Aug 2001 11:35:03 GMT

Posted twice, new to dis game

FRESH!

Mon, 06 Aug 2001 11:28:57 GMT

Yo yo yo, Hugo here, got my own Livejournal

This one goin out to my WIFE Krystelle and my kids Mookie and Alaraine.

Don't know why, they be never readin this, this is for my Internet CREW, yo yo WASSUP!

been workin on my fresh comic strip DA ROOLZ wid my buddy Ronny B, he be mixin up the dfresh ideas, me be kickin it pen-style. Reckon Chris CROZ be puttin it on Keenspot no time at all.

Not heard from CURT BERRY what he thinks of Da Roolz but it cant be long, yo.

Got a job workin as a tech for PC Warehouse in Canton, roofin not so good since I split my groin. Good job I took that night class, yo. Too many fat sweaty guys workin here but ther e be some FRESH PUSS on reception, she got a squinty eye but that make no diffrence wid da lights out knockin da boots, heh

Let ya know brothers, let ya know

FRESH!

Mon, 06 Aug 2001 11:27:26 GMT